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November 18, 2009

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colleen (bcharmer)

I don't know. At first I think that people don't believe that they're bad, but the more I ponder this idea, the more I think that deep down inside, many people feel and believe (like religion) that they are inherently bad, and they're terrified that someone's gonna find out just how low and horrible they really are. So they put on airs, buy expensive clothes, give to charities. Essentially, they pretend that they're good but not in a truly generous grounded way. They do it as a cover-up for what they think is the real person inside. Their actions are disjointed and hyper and grandiose. I imagine their small, child-like self cowering in the corner of their soul, feeling abandoned and unheard.

Boy, I don't think I cheered myself up with this comment. But I guess the take home for me is that I believe that everyone, at their deepest level IS good. But we get too ingrained with our "bad-ness" to relax and be our authentic selves. One of the reasons I love Elsita's and your posts are because I feel that you are both true to your inner voices...

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